Saturday, August 25, 2007

If Rice is not an Option on your Wedding Day...

What better day to try something different than on your wedding day? Remember it’s Your Day ~ Your Way !!! One small change that you can customize is the ‘rice throwing’. Granted not many people really throw rice anymore, but the sentiment of wishing the happy couple good luck is still there. So lets look some of the options available:


Rice – It’s the most traditional choice. We're cautioned not to throw rice at the bride and groom, because the grain will prove harmful to the birds who swoop down to eat it. Uncooked, milled rice is no more harmful to birds than rice in the field, says Mary JoCheesman of the U S Rice Federation. The birds are safe, but the guests could be injured if they were to slip and fall. If that’s not an issue, at your location, and the tradition of rice feels best to you then go for it! They even sell it in a cooked format that is then shaped into wedding bells, doves, etc...


Birdseed – Always nice to feed a few birds on your wedding day, but trying to get all that birdseed out of your hair is a nightmare and some facilities may feel the same way about birdseed as they do about rice!


Bubbles – Fun and whimsical. They can be purchased in small favor sized bottles and even customized with the wedding information. Check your local Dollar Store for the best prices!!


Butterflies – Beautiful thought to send butterflies free to fly around you, but you have to make sure the boxes you receive contain live butterflies and that you have enough to even be seen. Be certain to deal with a reputable vendor, only release on a day above 60 degrees and in the middle of the afternoon so they have time to find something to eat before they must find a place to roost for the night.


Doves - Similar to butterflies. Choose a reputable vendor and practice with them (before the ceremony) so you know the correct way to hold and release them.


Bells or other noisemakers – Perfect for venues which don’t allow anything to be thrown, but be sure to let the little ones know they’re just to ring and not to throw!


Confetti – Can be bought in a variety of colors and glittering effects. However, it’s notoriously difficult to clean up even with vacuuming. For this reason most locations probably won’t allow it. On the plus side it can come in a variety of shapes and be great for a theme wedding even just spread out on the reception tables.


Sparklers – Fantastic effect for an evening wedding. Get the larger ones so that the sparkle will last longer. They also make them with a wood center (rather than metal) so they are safer for youngsters.


Flower petals or Lavender – Very romantic and beautiful to see a shower of petals/buds. They are easier to clean up then confetti and without the hassle of birdseed getting in your hair.

Wednesday, August 22, 2007

Exchanging a Rose as your first gift to each other...

Actually, your first gift to each other is your Wedding Rings. However, your first gift as Husband and Wife can be a single rose. In the past, the rose was considered a symbol of love and a single rose always meant only one thing - it meant the words "I love you."

I would suggest that wherever you make your home in the future - whether it be a large and elegant home - or a small and graceful one - that you both pick one very special location for roses; so that on each anniversary of your wedding you both may place a rose in that spot both as a re-commitment to your marriage - and a re-commitment that THIS will be a marriage based upon love.

Unfortunately, in every marriage there are times where it is difficult to find the right words. It might feel impossible, some times to say the words "I am sorry" or "I forgive you"; "I need you" or "I am hurting". Despite the stresses, that are inevitable in everyone’s lives, participating in the Rose Exchange in your Wedding Ceremony creates an opportunity to mend a Heart in the future...

So if you simply can not find the words, leave a rose at that spot which both of you have selected - for that rose then says what matters most of all and should overpower all other things and all other words. That rose says the words: "I still love you."

Sunday, August 19, 2007

Getting Started...

Set your date and book your venues as early as possible. Some facilities offer a discount for a Friday or Sunday wedding!

Devotion to Detail will be your greatest asset. Start by keeping an Expandable File for all those little slips of paper, estimates, contracts and other information in one central location. Being organized can help you eliminate worries! There is no need to pay someone to do something you can do yourself!

Encourage open communication with your fiancé by sharing what you envision and desire. If you are paying for most of the wedding yourselves, take stock of your financial resources and plan a realistic budget based on the number of guests.

Think about creating your own bouquets with bulk flowers purchased from a warehouse-type store with some ribbon from a craft store. You can get a lot for a few hundred dollars! When it comes down to saving money, however, decide if it’s really worth it to take the time to do something like hand-stamping all the place cards !!

Consider visiting one or more Bridal Expos. They are a great place to see a lot at one time, under one roof, and collect ideas and information. Many offer everything from fashion shows to cake sampling stations, luxury car rental companies to travel agencies. Spending some time at an Expo can help you decide where you want to splurge and where you can save a few dollars.

You can even create a Blog to keep everyone informed. You can include directions, introduce the bridal party to guests and include a personal story of how the two of you met (as well as special moments throughout your courtship and how you became engaged). Include some photos along the way! If you have out of town guests, Hotel information and suggestions for "things to do" can be included to help guests feel more welcome.

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Wedding Ceremonies 101

Can we write our own Vows??
In theory, it sounds like an excellent idea and I am delighted if you want to contribute to the creation of your ceremony by the writing of your vows. I’ll be happy to help you turn your thoughts into words, or your words into a memorable part of your ceremony. But, you certainly are not required to do that. A very small percentage of my couples seriously consider it and fewer yet actually end up using them in their ceremony. I have some lovely vows that you can repeat after me or read them to each other in unison or by alternating lines...

What is the Officiant's Fee based upon??
Being a minister is my passion and my primary source of income. As I am not affiliated with one particular church/denomination, I do not receive a salary as some Pastors do. To date, I have performed over 150 ceremonies and ultimately, spend many hours with each of my couples (either by e-mail or phone) in order to make certain that the final Ceremony is the one they’ve always dreamed of! There are many hours spent "Behind the Scene" in order to prepare for the amount of time it eventually requires to actually perform the wedding! If you consider the Officiant fee, as compared to the Cake, Dress, Flowers and Photographer, it really is quite reasonable...

Will you do outside/location ceremonies??
Yes, considering Travel, I’ll come to any location (with good directions ;-) Inside or out, big or small, fancy or simple - my goal is to provide you with the Ceremony that best meets your needs, which includes the Location...

When should we get our license??
I have performed weddings in Pennsylvania and Maryland. Each state has different time constraints so check with your local County courthouse. However, there is usually a three day waiting period so do not wait until the last week, unless absolutely necessary. Also, you must present your License to me Before the ceremony so I can verify it’s validity. Make certain once you obtain your License that you put it in a safe place and remember to bring it along to the ceremony - put someone else in charge if you think you may forget!

Do you require counseling??
I do not require it, but it is available should you feel the need to “compare notes” in a Judgement Free environment. Weddings are stressful, especially when it comes to spending money! Also, often each of the couples family’s come from different backgrounds, different religions - sometimes it helps to have someone that can listen and offer advice to each of you without having a vested interest!

Can my Photographer use a Flash during the Ceremony??
That is totally up to you - it’s Your Day! Of course you want as much as possible to be remembered on film so we’ll work together to accomplish that goal. During the ceremony, you’ll be facing each other (rather than me) and holding hands so everyone can see your faces. If you decide to add a Unity Ceremony (Candle or Sand) I recommend that you stand behind the table, rather than in front of it, so that everyone, including the photographer can see what is taking place. Other than that, I just request the discretion of the Photographer as it is a solemn occasion!

What other type of elements can be added to the Ceremony??
Other than a Unity Ceremony, there are Remberances for Absent or Deceased family members, presenting Roses to the Mothers and special Readings done by other individuals. If there are children of the Bride and/or Groom, we can include them in either of the Unity ceremonies, a Medallion or Ring Ceremony or even just a short passage that speaks of how a Marriage creates a Family!

Do we need a Rehearsal??
Again, that is totally up to you. Before you decide to have one think about why you’re doing it... If you’d like to include the Groom’s family by having them provide the Rehearsal Dinner, that doesn’t mean that you need to have a full-blown Rehearsal at the facility where the wedding is occurring. I often find that couples can have a simple run-through (without paying for my time and travel) on their own and still enjoy the company of friends and family at a Dinner. However, should you decide that you’ll be more comfortable having me there, that can certainly be arranged!

The Wedding is a only a week away - what do I do, now??
The most important thing, in my book, is to be thankful. Think about how grateful you are that you have found your soul mate, and that you are pledging each other your eternal love and loyalty - and that you’ll be spending the rest of your life with your Best Friend Other than that, it’s all icing on the cake ;-)

Do you perform other ceremonies??
Yes, I provide a full Ministry. I offer Baby Blessings/Christenings, Vow Renewal Ceremonies, Commitment Ceremonies, House and Business Blessings. I also offer Memorial/Funeral services for humans and even for animal companions! Basically, I offer my services for any “Rite of Life” occasion that you would like to memorialize.

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Welcome...

Hello all... I decided to join the 21st Century and start a Blog.
From time to time, I'll share helpful information
as well as interesting tidbits from various
(mostly Wedding) ceremonies we have performed -
from the Beautiful to the Unbelievable ;-)


Fondly ~ Rev. Melanie